The Latest Starbucks ‘Name’ Meme Is Ridiculously Complicated

Starbucks is infamous for two things: weird recipes and baristas who refuse to write anyone’s name correctly on cups. I think the latter is actually quite purposeful on the part of the baristas, who serve annoying, rude, and demanding customers all day long. Why not have a little fun and write something ridiculous on an order? Then you can call it out to a crowded room and that person has to answer. A petty revenge against a tyrannical customer base.

There’s a new meme in town on Twitter that takes full advantage of this name-calling dynamic. It’s a bit hard to explain, but the meme phrase always starts with, “I just gave my name in Starbucks as—” followed by a false name. The poster then writes what happens after their fake name is called out to a crowd. The crowd usually responds. If that sound complicated, try reading one and you’ll get it:

The meme began as a way to mock an account called @WUFlagMafia, which is an anti-Brexit group. While I am not pro-Brexit, this story sounds like absolute bull-crap:

The idea that people would stand up and scream over a political slogan at a Starbucks was roundly mocked:

It has quickly turned into something else entirely:

Since then, some of them have become much harder to understand than others, because it’s kind of the perfect meme to squeeze just about any idea into. All you need to do is think of a call and response and you can make it fit. Like if you have some geological drama to work out:

It’s now a meme for people with such specific interests that the only other place they can get attention for them besides Twitter is academia. Twitter is much cheaper:

The meme is often couched as “advice,” like try shouting this and just enjoy the results. But the results are always terrible:

Like, why would you want that to happen? Just give me my dang coffee! The secret subtext of the Starbucks name meme is that people want to argue:

We all dream of having someone call our name in a Starbucks and receiving applause, but the trust me: the baristas will still hate you.