25 Things We Should Stop Doing Before We Hit 30 (But Probably Won’t)

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Growing up is tough; you have a bunch more responsibilities, you can’t drink in the daytime and you’re supposed to know the names of all the people you hook up with. And there are a few things we still do that might be holding this whole maturity malarky back a little. Doesn’t mean we’re likely to stop doing them any time soon though:

1. Waking up in a stranger’s bed with your shoes still on….but no pants, never any pants.

2. Spending your entire paycheck within 48 hours of receiving it.

3. Giving the pizza delivery boy a larger tip for delivering directly to your room.

4. Sharing a three bedroom house with three friends, two strangers, someone’s dog and an iguana that no one’s claimed yet.

5. Drinking fruity cocktails – its wine, beer or face melting liquor from here on out. Drinking after 30 is not meant to be fun.

6. Remaining friends with people that totally hooked up with your ex, a few times, over several nights, when everyone could see. Looking at you Alex.

7. Swearing. Like all the fucking time.

8. Walks of shame, strides of pride, saunters of you should’ve oughta’s…you know, walking home in the AM in your fancy dress and sex hair.

9. Wearing 18 different bracelets from 12 different festivals, some of which you didn’t even go to.

10. …and you can take that ankle bracelet off as well. It’s starting to smell funny.

11. Getting very large hickey’s in very obvious places.

12. Rolling your eyes at every engagement photo shoot that crops up on your FB wall.

13. Drunk puking. You’re only allowed to be “sick” when you’re actually sick.

14. Crawling up the stairs like you’re a wild, untamed beast.

15. Using song lyrics for your facebook status. Actually, that one should have ended in middle school.

16. Pretending that taking the stairs = going to the gym.

17. Wearing your favorite T-Shirt you got when you were 16.

18. …even though Fall Out Boy are still the greatest band that ever lived.

19. Sleeping with your blanket, especially when you’re crashing at someone else’s house.

20. Pulling a sickie because you’re too hungover to function.

21. Reasoning that pizza is healthy so long as you limit your toppings to only two kinds of meat.

22. Only knowing enough about politics to comment on Donald Trump’s hair.

23. Writing passive aggressive comments on people’s vacation pictures.

24. Getting take away because you only have ketchup, half a sandwich and miracle whip in the fridge.

25. Learning to cook beyond you’re famous melted cheese with pasta. It’s not even a real meal.

PuckerMob

Written by PuckerMob

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